by How to Prevent Breakups
I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that you’re much better off taking steps to PREVENT a breakup than you are trying to REVERSE a breakup after it happens.
Although it is definitely possible to get your ex back, breakups are a huge headache that you should avoid if at all possible.
In the video above relationship expert Brad goes over the seven steps you need to take to prevent a breakup, right now.
Video Transcript:
Are you afraid that your relationship is Headed in the wrong direction What if i told you that you could Prevent a breakup before it even happens Hi guys i’m brad browning breakup coach And relationship expert now i’ve helped Thousands of people around the world get A second chance after a messy breakup If you’d like help get during this this Kind of difficult time with your breakup Don’t hesitate to like this video and Comment below i love hearing what you Have to say and i respond to as many Comments as i can Now i’m sure that i don’t have to tell You that you’re much better off taking Steps to Prevent a breakup then you are trying to Reverse a breakup After it happens now i know it’s Definitely possible to get your ex back I am the best-selling author of the ex Factor program after all But breakups are a huge headache that You really want to avoid if at all Possible So in this video i’m going to go over The seven steps that you need to take to Prevent a breakup right now Starting with number one which is to Address the problems Now if you are watching this video it Means that you think your relationship Might be almost over if that’s the case
Then i’m guessing your relationship has Some serious issues That you’re not properly addressing now I’m sure you’ve made attempts to To talk about those issues um but it Always feels like the wrong time right Or maybe one of you i will bring up Those issues and then the other person Will deflect it or try to just sweep it Under the rug Only to find that it never really goes Away well that can stop today If you want to have any chance of Preventing your breakup you need to take Steps to get this issue out in the open And start working on it as mr rogers Used to say If it’s mentionable it’s manageable any Problem can be solved if you’re willing To to face it head-on Together now what this looks like will Depend on your particular relationship But in any case you need to set aside Some time to sit down with your partner And have a frank and open discussion About what’s coming between you Now i’m not saying this is going to have 100 success rate but if you don’t get This monkey off your back You won’t be able to prevent your Breakup and number two is to commit to Working it out Now this goes hand in hand with number One that i just talked about um
Often we can feel reluctant to discuss Our deepest issues with our partners Because We’re worried that they won’t stick Around once they know the truth but let Your partner know that you care about Them And that you’re in this for the long Haul you’re not here to fight with them Or find a reason to leave You want to settle the conflict so that You two can be happy together Moving forward now in that same spirit Don’t put any ultimatums on the Relationship So you know that includes statements Like um if you don’t do this then i’m Leaving you Or either we should get married or we Should break up these kinds of Statements rarely get the result you’re Looking for and really only serve to Create More tension in the relationship because They tell your partner that your love For them is a hundred percent Conditional So instead tell your partner how you Feel when they do certain things and Offer alternatives That might work for both of you and That’s a perfect segue into number three On the list Compromise now relationships are all
About compromise I know it’s not sexy but it is true the Goal Is to create a relationship where your Needs and your partner’s needs are Equally important for both of you So many people you know tend to defend Their own desires above All else and somehow what they want Always seems to slip out of their grasp But remember this is a partnership not a War right So if you can compromise and allow your Partner to have their way a little more Often You’ll start to find that they’re Willing to extend the same courtesy to You So here’s a little exercise that i Suggest all couples who are constantly Butting heads give a try so when you Disagree about something small You both need to decide how important it Is that you get your way in this Situation So give it a rating out of 10 and then At the same moment Say your ratings out loud whoever has The higher rating Gets to make the final choice now this Can avoid the constant bickering That’s the death of so many otherwise Happy relationships And by making this concrete you and your
Partner will start to come to an Understanding Of what you really care about and how You can get you can better compromise in The future Number four be affectionate so when a Relationship is struggling it’s Perfectly natural for For affection sex and just intimate Touch to fade away It stands to reason that if you’re Constantly fighting you’re really not Going to be inclined to be Romantic but this is actually when People need affection the most Now there’s been tons of studies that Show how affection and physical touch Are linked to higher relationship Satisfaction so You need to get to a place in your Relationship where conflict doesn’t get In the way of affection Now i’m not saying that you should you Know go in for the hug right in the Middle of a screaming match It’s all about making space for for Genuine affection to shine through Despite what else may be happening in Your life or in your relationship Now this is going to help you both to Remember that you’re on the same team And at the end of the day that you still Love one another number five Is to take a breather so many couples
Don’t realize that you can take a break While you’re fighting So many people see this as you know Running away or they get offended When someone leaves the room during a Fight but it turns out this is actually A much healthier way to deal with Conflict so as i always say The idea that you shouldn’t go to bed Angry is just totally wrong Sometimes the extra time you spend Thinking on an issue can make all the Difference And this is especially true if you’re Someone who says things that they they Tend to regret In the heat of the moment so you know Think of it like honestly having taking A time out For adults if you have kids you know Just how effective this strategy can be To kind of cool things down and prevent Further escalation So next time you find yourself getting Into a shouting match Take a deep breath and then suggest Putting a pin in the discussion until You’ve had a while to to think about Things i promise you will be glad you Did now if you’re worried that your Relationship is heading for breakup Um right now is the time to act so head Over to breakupbrad.com Coaching sign up for my personal
Coaching service and work with me One-on-one on an ongoing basis To ensure that you can rebuild a healthy Relationship And avoid a breakup number six break the Cycle Now relationships can easily get caught In a negative cycle where where one Problem creates another And then all of a sudden something Simple has spiraled out of control Now it often goes like this say your Girlfriend or boyfriend Isn’t fulfilling your need for for love And attention because you know they’re Too busy with work this week So in return you feel less inclined to Give them the positive validation that You know maybe they wanted for For some career achievement that they’ve Just they’ve just reached so now You both feel like you’re you’re being Mistreated so the next time you have a Date night together Neither one of you puts in the effort And you spend most of the evening Looking at your phones Now this time that could have brought You two together really only serves to Highlight the problems in your Relationship And so the cycle continues but if you Can recognize this process In action you can be the one to break
The cycle By treating your partner right despite How they may be acting in the moment So this might feel a little unfair but Remember that you’re trying to make this Relationship Last now i’m sure there have been times Where there will be times When you’ve been selfish towards your Partner and they’ve still managed to put Your happiness first And avoided falling into this negative Cycle and as i’ve said The more you’re able to go above and Beyond for your partner the more they’re Going to take notice And start to do the same now this is the Kind of cycle that you want to create You know one where your happiness Feeds off of one another all right and On to number seven stop Avoiding conflict now fighting with Someone you love is never a good time And that’s why we we often avoid Conflict at all costs But rather than creating peace and Harmony in a relationship this usually Just lets the problem You know fester and become bigger and More unmanageable so This is why you need to embrace conflict Rather than avoiding it See conflict isn’t just about the thing You’re fighting about
Because often you know we tie conflict To our own self-worth So that means that fighting with a Partner makes us feel bad about the Relationship About our partner and about ourselves so That’s why we need to Change the way that we look at conflict Because conflict can actually be a Method for understanding another person So think of it this way whenever two People interact Conflict is inevitable because no two People are identical right We all have different behaviors Different wants needs expectations So if you can keep calm and discuss this Problem with that in mind Not only will you be able to come to a Compromise you’ll also be able to use This conflict To understand what’s most important to You and to your partner And in the end conflict is as valuable As peace because it really reveals our Character Allowing us to fall for them all over Again number eight Focus on yourself now this might be Counterintuitive to so much relationship Advice that you hear these days But focusing on yourself can actually Save your relationship In certain situations for example many
Women that i talk to I feel like they’re the only one putting Into putting any effort into their Relationship And yet their partner is still pulling Away from them and this is a really Common pattern in modern relationships But the answer isn’t to continue Treating that other person like gold in Hopes that they’re going to realize how Much a ca Of a catch you are and start doing the Same in this kind of situation it’s Actually advisable That you pull away a little bit and Start putting that energy into treating Yourself properly for a change And then in some other situations you Know it’s not quite so concrete The truth is that at the end of the day The only person we have control over is Ourselves so if we find that we’re Constantly butting heads in a Relationship because we can’t get our Partner To behave the way we’d like them to then The solution is not to get more Aggressive with them or to play any kind Of mind game Really the best course of action is to Focus on the one person whose actions we Can control Ourselves and that really means putting Your own mental and physical health
First Before you try and tackle issues in the Relationship it’s really easy To become so fixated on our Relationships that we lose touch Of you know other parts of ourselves and Our lives so turning inward just a Little bit Can help to break the cycle and put Everything back into perspective And that just about does it for this Video i hope you guys found some tools That you can use in your own life and Your own relationship moving forward If you did i want to hit that like Button and also subscribe so you can Get notified when i release more videos Like this one in the future Of course you can find my full free Video presentation at breakupbrad.com And get my help with your situation at Breakupbrad.com Coaching thanks very much for watching See you next time You
